Just for Today

"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment."

~ Buddha

Just like that, another holiday season is over, officially over as of today.  Another year past. Decorations boxed and stored.  Journals from the past year reviewed.  Just like that.  Like so many holidays of the past.  Over in the blink of an eye.  And at the same time, so unlike other holiday seasons we have known together.  Far less frenetic.  Far more uncertain. 

I have been tempted to make a list of resolutions, create a list of specific goals, design a year of special events and special memories, as I have so many years in the past - anything to gain a semblance of control. Fortunately, I was reminded, by Dear Abby no less, that there is a simpler way, one that I believe will serve John and me much better this coming year.

On New Year's Day, the current Abby, the original's daughter, shared an often-requested list of resolutions that her mother adapted from the original credo of Al-Anon.  I prefer to think of them as guidelines or aspirations that can provide a framework for a simpler, more mindful year.  I offer my edited highlights, those that speak most to me, and a couple more that these have inspired.

"Just for Today:  I will live through This Day Only.  I will not brood about yesterday or obsess about tomorrow."

"Just for Today:  I will not dwell (my emphasis) on thoughts that depress (or worry, or frighten, or anger, or...) me."

"Just for Today:  I will accept what is.  I will face reality.  I will (strive to) correct those things I can correct and accept those I cannot."

"Just for Today:  I will improve my mind.  I will read something that requires effort, thought, and concentration."  Or inspiration.

"Just for Today:  I will do something to improve my health."

And....
Just for Today:  I will do something that is creative and enjoyable.

Just for Today:  I will do something to simplify our home.

Just for Today:  I will do something with John that is fun.

If any of these guidelines speak to you also, I encourage you to read the original list in its totality.   And whether you create resolutions, or goals, or guidelines, or choose to let the year unfold as it will, may it be a healthy, happy one.

In the Blink of an Eye

     "The great measure of human maturation is the increasing understanding that we

 move through life in the blink of an eye; that we are not long with the privilege of having eyes to see, ears to hear, a voice with which to speak and arms to put round a loved one; that we are simply passing through."

                                                             ~ David Whyte

I have come to this understanding - that we move through life in the blink of an eye - several times in recent years.  Usually, it strikes me again with the news that someone is older than I think he or she is (my nephew who is 45, not 35), or that a celebrity I have followed for years has just died (Natalie Cole), or that an historical event happened longer ago than I remember ( The Sound of Music is 50 years old).

I seem to be thinking this more often these past few months, however, as I notice more and more evidence of my own aging process.  When I look in the mirror and see my mother's face.  When I find it has taken me longer to accomplish a certain task than it did even five years ago or that it has taken more energy.  When the passage of time as measured in the birthdays or anniversaries of loved ones comes as a shock - an uncle who is 90, a couple celebrating their 50th anniversary.  Or, as happened this past week, when I awoke with the startling realization that this was my 75th Christmas and were my father alive, he would be 100 this year.  In the blink of an eye.

This realization can be daunting.  Perhaps it is why we put it away, forget it, are continually surprised when it surfaces again.  Or it can be a gift, a measure of our maturation as David Whyte asserts.  This year I want to hold onto it, to use it to inspire the choices I make and especially the way I spend the gift of another year.  

It was, therefore, with a serendipitous pleasure that I came upon the recent column of Dear Abby entitled "New year is opportunity to set a goal for the future" in which Jeanne Phillips shared her mother's New Year's Resolutions, adapted from the original credo of Al-Anon. They capture my intentions for the coming year.  I've abridged them for myself, added to them, copied them and posted them throughout the house.  I share them in the hope they can inspire you as much as they do me.

  Just for Today;  I will concentrate on this day only.  I will not dwell in the past or worry about tomorrow.  
  Just for Today:  I will be content.  I will focus on the positive. 
  Just for Today:  I will accept what is.  I will correct those things I can correct and accept those I cannot.
  Just for Today:  I will improve my mind.  I will do something that requires effort, thought and concentration.
  Just for Today:  I will make a conscious effort to be agreeable.  I will refrain from trying to improve anybody but myself. (My husband loves this one!)
  Just for Today:  I will do something to improve my health. 
  Just for Today:  I will be grateful for all I have and especially, for all those who love and support me, and -
  Just for Today:  I will not forget that "we move through life in the blink of an eye."